Safer Sex

Safer Sex

There are many points to consider as you and your partner(s) choose safer sex and contraceptive options. Condoms and dental dams are often recommended as the best safer sex choice for college students, but you may want to try different options until you find the one(s) you like best. An individual may switch methods because of changes in relationships, age, health, economic security and lifestyle. To help you decide which method to use, you may want to consider the following questions as you read through these pages:

  • How will it fit into your lifestyle?

  • How convenient is it to use?

  • Will it help prevent sexually transmitted infections (STIs)?

  • How effective is it in preventing pregnancy?

  • How safe is it?

  • How much will it cost?

Below we also discuss how you can obtain each safer sex or contraceptive option. To schedule an appointment at Health Services, you can call 401.863-3953. 

You will also find a guide to potential risks by sexual behavior. This information, along with self-knowledge and communication with your partner(s), will allow you to choose sex that is most enjoyable and comfortable for you. If you are not sexually active now, thinking about these things now can be helpful for the future. 

The content on this page was developed by Brown students from the Sexual Health Awareness Group (SHAG) in collaboration with Health Promotion staff.

Sex is about knowing yourself

Before you become sexual with someone (whether for the night or longer-term), know what you are comfortable with. Everyone has a different level of comfort with being sexual. However you feel is okay. Your beliefs, experiences and circumstances are unique and what works for someone else may not be right for you.

Think about...

  • What type(s) of sex you are interested in.

  • Which safer sex supplies you will you use. (Keep them close by.)

  • Whether or not alcohol and drugs play a role in how you are sexual.

  • Your comfort, desires, and beliefs and how they may change over time.

Having these things in mind before you find yourself in the heat of the moment can help you to make effective decisions and have a positive and comfortable sexual experience. At the same time, don't expect yourself to know everything. Healthy sexuality is about learning and exploration. 

Sex is about health

Part of knowing yourself is knowing your body. Getting regular medical care is key to your overall health. Your medical care should include regular HIV and STI testing if you are sexually active. Also consider asking your healthcare provider about vaccines that can prevent hepatitis A and B and the most common strains of HPV. (The HPV vaccine is recommended for people of all genders.) For you have a vagina and a cervix, annual GYN exams are an important part of your wellbeing. See the resources section for on-campus and Providence area sexual health care providers. 

Sex is a conversation

Sex is about knowing what you want and communicating that to your partner(s). Just as importantly, sex is about hearing what your partners want. The key is for each of you to communicate your desires and your boundaries.

Communication is serious, but the way you talk about sex doesn't have to be. If talking about sex seems awkward, go with it! Sex is silly. Sex is naughty. Try talking that way! Play a sex game. Use your safer sex tools as foreplay. Tell them what you want and how you want it without censoring yourself. You're free to communicate in any way you choose. Explore what works for you.

- Brown student

Sex is about consent

Consent is freely, consciously and enthusiastically saying yes. If you are ever unsure, stop and ask.

Whether you are being sexual for the first time with someone, have been sexual with them in the past, or are in an ongoing relationship, you and they always have the right to change your mind. Again, think about how alcohol and drugs may impact both your and your partner's ability to give consent. You deserve to feel respected and safe in all sexual situations. (Health Promotion staff can offer support around safety and consent in sexual situations.)

Open communication before and during (even after!) sex ensures consent and makes sex more comfortable and enjoyable. 

Sex is about choices

Every sexual activity, with or without safer sex materials, entails some amount of risk. Learning about risks allows you to make informed choices about which sexual practices you engage in and what safer sex materials you will use. Learning about risks may also mean that you choose not to be sexually active.

Think about your risk limits and work to stay within them. Concerns about STIs and pregnancy can get in the way of enjoying sexual experiences. This guide is designed to help you take steps to be safer and to feel more comfortable during sex. 

Your tool box

Safer sex supplies won't do you any good if they aren't on hand when you need them. Plan ahead. Have condoms, latex dams, gloves, lube, and other safer sex supplies nearby if sexual activity is a possibility. Keep a supply within arm's reach of your bed or in your backpack or purse to make sure you have them to use during sex. 

Condoms

Condoms greatly reduce the risk of getting or passing on many STIs, including HIV, if they are used correctly each time you have sex or share sex toys. Condoms come in many different types and sizes. You can try out different kinds to see which feel best to you. It is important to know that only latex and polyurethane condoms are effective at preventing transmission of HIV and other STIs. Other condoms, such as lambskin condoms, do not prevent the transmission of HIV and other STIs.

Internal condoms (also called female condoms) are polyurethane condoms you can put into the vagina or anus before sex. Although they are often called female condoms, they can be used by people of any gender for anal sex.

Different people prefer different kinds of condoms. Whether you like condoms that are flavored, unflavored, internal, external, latex or polyurethane, the important thing is for you and your partner(s) to decide which are best for you and to use them every time.

Two important notes on lubricant and spermicides and condoms:

  • If you are worried about your risk of HIV and STIs, spermicides, such as Nonoxynol 9, should be avoided. Spermicides, and condoms with spermicidal lube, can cause irritation of the vagina, anus and penis. This irritation increases the chance of getting or passing on HIV and other STIs.

  • For vaginal sex (and for oral sex on a vulva), it is best to use condoms or lube that are not flavored and which don't contain glycerin. Glycerin can make yeast infections more likely for some people.

Dental dams

You can use dental dams during oral sex on a vulva or anus to prevent the spread of HIV and other STIs. Dental dams are square pieces of stretchy latex or plastic placed between the mouth and the vulva or anus. (If you drop the dental dam, use a new one. You won't be able to tell which side you were on.)

If you don't have a dental dam you can make your own -- use a large piece of plastic wrap or cut a condom or glove into a flat rectangle and use it in the same way. 

Lube

When putting a penis, fingers or a sex toy inside a vagina or anus, using lots of water or silicone based lubricant can lower friction a lot, making sex more pleasurable, and help keep a condom from breaking. With latex condoms use only water or silicone based lubes. Don't use oil-based lubricants, such as Vaseline, massage oils, or food oils, because they can break down the latex in the condom causing it to be ineffective at preventing HIV and STI transmission or pregnancy. 

Gloves

When putting fingers inside the vagina or anus, you can wear latex, polyurethane or nitrile gloves to reduce the risk of getting STIs though tiny cuts on your hands. 

Stocking your tool box

Safer sex supplies are easily available on campus. Supplies are available in the 1st or 3rd floor bathrooms or in Health Promotion on the 3rd floor. The Identity Centers across campus, SHAG peer educators and RPLs in the residence halls also have safer sex supplies.  All locations offer external condoms and dental dams. In Health Promotion we also offer internal condoms, non-latex condoms, XL size condoms, gloves, and lubricant. Brown students can also order safer sex supplies online for delivery to their campus mailbox through Ship n SHAG

All of our safer sex supplies are available without charge. We just ask that you take only what you need and that you not use the free supplies if you need large quantities. If you need larger amounts of condoms, you can purchase 50 condoms for $5 or 100 condoms for $10 from the Health Services Pharmacy.

Understanding risk

Know which sexual activities can put you at risk for STIs or unintended pregnancy. Read through each of the behaviors listed below for a better understanding of your risk.

Oral sex

An important note: During oral sex, STIs can be transmitted from the genitals to the mouth or from the mouth to the genitals.

Mouth to anus

  • Known risks

    • hepatitis A

    • parasites

    • bacterial infections

    • herpes

    • syphilis

  • Unknown risks

    • HPV

    • chlamydia

    • gonorrhea

Mouth to vulva

  • Known risks

    • herpes

    • syphilis

  • Possible risks

    • HIV

    • hepatitis B (giving oral sex, if there is menstrual blood)

  • Unknown risks

    • HPV

    • chlamydia

    • gonorrhea

Safer sex tips:

  • Place a dental dam over the vulva or anus. (Our link also gives instructions on how to make your own dental dam.)

  • Use some lube on the inside of the dam to feel good. It is best to use non-flavored and non-glycerin lube on vulvas.

  • Use your dam as a tool to add sensation and increase your partner's pleasure. Ask what kind of pressure or movement works for them or experiment together.

Mouth to penis

  • Known risks

    • herpes

    • syphilis

    • gonorrhea

    • chlamydia

  • Possible risks

    • HIV

    • hepatitis B

 

Safer sex tips:

  • Use a condom! The best condoms for oral sex on a penis are non-lubed condoms or flavored condoms.

  • If you don't use a condom, don't take cum in your mouth.

  • Wait at least an hour after you've brushed or flossed your teeth, before having oral sex.

  • Avoid oral sex if you have bleeding gums or sores in your mouth. 

Vaginal sex and anal sex

During vaginal or anal sex, both people are at risk of getting and giving STIs, including HIV. The risk for contracting HIV is higher for the receptive partner (the lining of the vagina or and offers HIV an easier entry into the body). Sharing sex toys can also put people at risk for STIs.

Known risks

  • HIV

  • gonorrhea

  • chlamydia

  • syphilis

  • herpes

  • HPV

  • hepatitis B

  • Vaginal sex: trichomoniasis

Unknown risks

  • hepatitis C

Safer sex tips:

Use a new condom or internal condom for each act of sex.
Reduce friction! Add extra lube (even if you are using a lubed condom).
Remember that pregnancy is possible with penis to vulva contact, even if penetration does not occur.
Get full condom use tips here. Get full internal condom use tips here

Genital rubbing and outercourse

Genital rubbing and outercourse can transmit STIs. Using a condom or dental dam can help to reduce these risks. STIs that can be transmitted during penetrative sex can also be transmitted during genital rubbing, although not as easily. For example, there is a misconception that vulva to vulva sex is without risk. In fact, STIs like HPV and herpes can be transmitted, as well as yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis.

Sharing sex toys can also transmit STIs. Change condoms or wash the toy when you share a toy with a partner or use a toy for a new area of the body (moving from anus to vulva for example). 

Just in Case

If you don't think your safer sex materials have been effective (for example, if the condom breaks) or if you did not use any, consider the following:

  • Emergency Contraception (Plan B): Also known as the "morning after pill", EC is most effective at preventing pregnancy within 72 hours after unprotected sex, but may be effective up to 120 hours (5 days) later. It is available without cost for any Brown student from the Brown Health Services pharmacy.

  • Post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP): If you believe that you have been exposed to HIV, PEP is a series of several drugs you take over a month that can help to prevent you from contracting HIV. Timing is extremely important for PEP as it is not effective beyond 72 hours after the exposure.

  • STI Testing: If you think you have been exposed to an STI due to unprotected sex, get tested.

  • Pregnancy Testing: You can take a pregnancy test as soon as your period is late. Some tests work a few days before a missed period. You can buy a DIY test at any drugstore or see a provider to be tested.

The community resources section immediately below has information on where to get EC, PEP, and STI and pregnancy testing services. 

On-Campus Resources

Health Services, 401.863-3953
Health Services provides comprehensive primary health care including STI testing, pregnancy testing, contraception, and emergency contraception for Brown students. Provider visits are free, but lab and prescription fees are charged. All services are confidential.

  • Safer sex supplies are available in the upper and lower lobbies.

  • HIV and other STI testing is available. Providers and nurses work with individual students to contact their insurance companies to confirm in-network coverage and navigate explanation of benefits issues that can arise with STI testing. The Brown student health insurance covers STI testing in full. 

  • Emergency contraception is available any time in the pharmacy. No out of pocket cost with your Brown student ID.

  • Pregnancy testing is available by appointment. Tests are free for Brown students. Results will be available during your visit. (Home test kits are also available in the pharmacy for $7 for a package of 2.)

  • Providers at Health Services can prescribe post exposure prophylaxis (PEP) for likely HIV exposure and the PEP medications can be obtained from the Health Services pharmacy.

Health Services is located at 450 Brook Street. Call ahead (401.863-3953) to schedule an appointment. Medical advice is available 24/7 at 401.863-1330.

Health Promotion, 401.863-2794 
Health Promotion offers:

  • Sexual health information including brochures and a lending library.

  • Appointments available with Naomi Ninneman to discuss sexual health questions or issues.

  • Appointments available with Health Promotion staff to discuss consent and sexual assault issues or experiences.

Health Promotion is located at 450 Brook Street. Call (401.863-2794) to make an appointment or stop by the office between 9 and 5 when classes are in session.

Off-Campus Resources

Planned Parenthood
175 Broad Street, 401.421-9620
HIV and other STI testing, pregnancy tests, contraception, abortion services.

Miriam Hospital Immunology Center
1125 N. Main Street, 401.793-4715.
HIV and other STI testing. Free. Anonymous testing available.

AIDS Project Rhode Island
404 Wickenden Street, 401.207- 8377.
HIV testing only. Free. Anonymous.

AIDS Care Ocean State
605 Elmwood Avenue, 401.781-0665
HIV testing only. Free. Anonymous.

PHONE NUMBERS
  • 401.863-2794
    Health Promotion
  • 401.863-3953
    Health Services
  • 401.863-6000
    Sexual Assault Response Line
  • 401.863-4111
    EMS
  • 401.863-3476
    Counseling & Psychological Services
  • 401.863-4111
    DPS